


{Do I Wanna Know?}

by cactuspunk (iktomi)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, hh sorry its mostly just suga talking to himself right now, i don't know what to tag this as yet, i guess i'll wait until more chapters come?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-02-25
Packaged: 2018-03-15 01:39:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3433268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iktomi/pseuds/cactuspunk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>"I'm sorry to interrupt,</i><br/>it's just I'm constantly on the cusp of trying to kiss you,<br/>I don't know if you feel the same as I do,<br/>but we could be together if you wanted to"</p>
<p>Suga's the one people go to for advice, the one that cares for everyone,<br/>so he's really not sure what to do when someone starts actively caring about him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	{Do I Wanna Know?}

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of a test for myself to see what extent I can elaborate on a single idea. 
> 
> I have no idea how many chapters this will end up being, but I'm hoping for a significant amount;;

  If you had something on your mind or needed solid advice, Sugawara Koushi was the one you went to.  
Or so he had heard, through his teammates hushed voices and agreeing nods. Suga wasn't about to deny it, though.  
  
  Many of the younger members of the team had come to him, at one point or another, to talk about their problems -- fears, hopes, dreams... hell, he even had to give the occasional biology lesson to his underclassmen. Suga would do anything in his power to try to help ease the stress and strain of high school life for his teammates, even if that meant sacrificing some of his personal time. He wanted to be the person he would've wanted to talk to at that point in his life.  
  
  Not that he had that much experience or wisdom to give -- he was only seventeen himself, after all. However, it wasn't hard for him to read his teammates, especially after all their practices together. For Suga, seeing how each individual acted and reacted when around their teammates told a lot about what kind of person they were, as well as how best to approach them. He had talked to each individual as well, of course, but he got to know them far more in-depth when they played together.  
  
  Which would probably explain for how well he had gotten to know Daichi over the past three years.  
  
  The thing about Daichi, though, was that he reciprocated Suga's warmness and thoughtfulness without hesitation. He wasn't shy about openly stating that he cared about Suga -- worried about him, even, and the thought of someone spending their time worrying about him was ...uncomfortable for Suga, to say the least. He would never admit it out loud to anyone, but he viewed himself as somehow less deserving of compassion. He didn't believe that anyone should waste their energy caring for or fussing over him. There were better ways for people to use their time.    
  
  Besides, he didn't feel worthy of attention, or anything positive whatsoever.   
  
  Suga had kind of gotten used to the way that Daichi treated him -- how he went out of his way to ask him how his day was, how he knew when he wasn't telling the truth, even how he spoke in softer, hushed tones when they were alone together. It wasn't unusual to see them at each other’s sides. It was just something that seemed natural.  
  
  What seemed very unnatural, though, was the way Suga felt flushed and lightheaded whenever Daichi was near him. It was something about the way he spoke, his mannerisms and inflection whenever he said specific words and names. It was the way he ran his fingers through his hair when he was feeling stressed, and the way the corners of his mouth turned up the tiniest bit when he saw a teammate hit a particularly successful spike. It was all these things and more that made Suga’s heart feel like it was trying to jackhammer it’s way out of his chest.  
  
  These feelings had started quite some time ago, but only recently had Suga paid any attention to them. If it had not become increasingly more prominent in the past year or so, he would've suppressed it -- buried it somewhere deep within himself, as he had always done.   
  
  There must have been something about Sawamura Daichi that Suga had never noticed until recently.   
  
  But what _was_ it?  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  After a couple of days of Suga persistently messing up during practice -- he even managed to hit himself in the face with his own set -- Daichi had advised him to take a day off from club activities to get himself together.  
  
  He wasn't exactly opposed to the idea, especially since he believed he must have been coming down with some sort of illness. The flushed, lightheaded feeling had seemed like a near constant for the past few days. On top of that, he was restless and jittery, often finding himself unable to sit still in classes or at home.  
  
  Now that he thought of it, though, Suga vaguely recalled all the times his underclassmen had come to him to express these exact same symptoms;  
The quickened pulse, the nervousness, the way they seemed to become far too warm and far too self-aware when...  
  
  _Oh_.  
  
  The realization hit him while he was walking home.  
  
 _I have a crush, don't I._

  
  

* * *

     


  _Today's the day._

_You're finally going to tell Daichi your true feelings._  
  
  This is what Sugawara had been telling himself since this morning -- 12:01AM, this morning, to be exact.  
  
  He hadn't slept, what with anxiety gnawing a hole straight through him and his heart threatening to beat right out of his chest. For hours now he had tossed, turned, made and remade his bed in an attempt to get comfortable enough to drift off. Rolling himself up in the sheets, he remembered dropping to the floor, at one point, too. No matter what he tried, the sick feeling in Suga's stomach just seemed to intensify with each passing minute.  
  
  His eyelids felt heavy, burdened with the weight of sleeplessness, but his mind was alive and buzzing with a thousand different scenarios and outcomes.  
  
  The light of daybreak caught Suga's attention and he sat up abruptly, immediately regretting his decision as the glare from the rising sun hit him full force. Drawing the sheet over his head, he flopped back down, nestling into the rest of the blankets. At this point, he was ready to forget the whole thing and stay in bed. He would have entertained this thought further if the Inter-High wasn't right around the corner. This was going to be one of their last chances to practice, and after last week's fiasco, he couldn't afford to miss it -- even if he wasn't in the starting lineup.

 

* * *

  
  
  
  The day flew by in a whirlwind of faces and classes and noise. He recalled next to nothing of who he saw or what had happened. His mind was preoccupied, still running through the pros and cons of admitting what exactly had him feeling so strange and distracted. Add that to his unsettled nerves, lack of sleep, and lack of food -- he had forgotten his wallet at home today, which turned out alright since Daichi offered to pay for him, and--  


_Oh yeah_.

_Daichi_.

  He was going to tell Daichi today.

 


End file.
